Inbox Roomba

I have a Roomba for my Inbox.

It bounces around my Inbox, dutifully picking up emails from my mother, trying to avoid less threatening items like reminders or even icky bills.

My mother knows it's there (or at least suspects it).

She tries to trick my Roomba with "test" emails, eCards, and other harmless messages. But my Roomba knows she is just lurking in the dark, waiting to pounce on any response, salivating and gnashing her teeth at the prospect of a return email with any "real life" content.

Apparently my mother's been busy. My Inbox Roomba just careens around in the same corner, twitching electronically and slightly smoking, and unfortunately it's missing some of those dirty emails. Maybe my Roomba's filter is jammed. I wonder if I can get a HEPA replacement filter upgrade...